i don’t care how many notes this gets. everyone who reblogs this will get a message to make them smile. even if it takes me forever.
(Source: s-onrisa, via wordandobject)
Irish Blessing from a Chain email
May there always be work for your hands to do;
May your purse always hold a coin or two;
May the sun always shine on your windowpane;
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;
May the hand of a friend always be near you;
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
and may you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows you’re dead.
Tosh. 0
Can someone please explain to me why even reruns of this show still make me laugh?
Ice in the Freezer pt. 3 [End]
“Now, son, you see high up there? In the corner? I need you to bring down the big tubs of ice cream. The Mayor asked for them for the 4th of July parade. We need on chocolate, one vanilla, and one strawberry. And just bring them up front for me” he instructed as he walked away wheezing. I almost told him not to call me son, but by the time I got the courage he was already walking away. I grabbed the ladder and made my way towards the far back corner.
Inside the refrigerator had three shelves on each wall, the ice cream is in the top corner in the back because that’s the coldest. And I’m only wearing a shirt and shorts. The tubs were heavy since they were 5 gallon tubs. The chocolate and vanilla were plentiful and easy to find, but strawberry was practically hidden. I finally found a tub tucked behind some ice packs. Even though I was shivering the thought of sneaking a sample of my favorite flavor ice cream was irresistible. The top was already opened, so I slipped it off and noticed how the ice cream had frosted over, meaning it had thawed then refrozen when returned to the freezer. As I chipped at the ice with my pocketknife an abnormally large chunk of ice flew out and landed on the ground. It made an interesting sound when it struck the ground and bounced. Upon investigation I noticed the ice was scratched or cracked, even though it fell 15 feet onto a concrete floor. I tasted it to find out it tasted like neither ice, nor ice cream. Puzzled, I place the ice in my pocket and sealed the strawberry tub and took it to Mr. Smith.
“Any trouble back there, Oliver?”
“I took me a while to find the last tub of strawberry, but that’s it.”
“Hmmm, might have to finally make some more strawberry, if this is the last tub. Well thank you Oliver. I’ll be closing down around 5…” I didn’t care when he closed or when he got home. I hopped on my bike and headed for the river, with any luck Anthony would be there fishing. As I approached the bank I could hear Anthony snoring. When I got closer I found his can of worms and hooked one, flicking it gingerly into the river. We’d never caught a fish in this river, but maybe today we’d get lucky. I looked up into the sky and watched the clouds. Suddenly the clouds made me remember the ice in my pocket. I pulled it out only to find it hadn’t melted, nor was pocket wet. This confused me more, so I looked closer at this mystery ice. About this time Anthony woke up with a big stretch and yawn.
“Whatcha you got there, Ollie?”
“Not sure. I found it in Mr. Smith’s freezer, and I thought it was ice, but it hasn’t done anything ice does.” He reached over as if expecting the fascinating object. I ignored his silent plea for a bit, until I figured it wouldn’t hurt to let him look at it. He slowly turned it over and over in is pudgy hands, examining the piece. It was about the size of a golf ball, but not exactly round. It was jagged, but not sharp enough to cut you. It was see through and sparkled in the light. Anthony was rubbing it, striking it against rocks, and tossing it up in the air. I could tell by his facial expressions that he was a clueless as me, which happened frequently. With a shrug he offered the glassy object back to me. As I reached for it, he flicked his wrist and the thing flew into the air on a beautiful arc, as it reached its apex it blocked the sun for a brief second and the whole world seemed to sparkle and glisten. Then it quickly fell and splashed in the river.
“What the hell Anthony?! That was mine!” I punched his arm a few times, as hard as I could but he just giggled. I’m not sure why but I was really angry he threw it in the river. I couldn’t help but think of its’ beauty be slowly covered by the murky riverbed.
Rule 2 → Every time you enter an iconic building, you attempt to steal an ashtray.
(via wordandobject)
Tumblr on Kindle Fire
Should make me more interested in this site after all… Speaking of which, can anyone suggested some good blogs slash Tumblr accounts to follow?
When beer prices get out of hand, head to social media
We’ve written lately about beer prices getting out of hand at bars in New York City. With the growing popularity of craft beer in the city, it’s no surprise that some businesspeople might try to take advantage of the boom by driving up prices.
How do we combat this?
